


Waiting for the Bathroom

by ANonsense



Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Bathroom Drama, Crack Treated Seriously, Demons, Family, Family Issues, Gen, Humor, Normal Life, Not actually drama, Poetry, Rhyming, for the lols
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-01
Updated: 2014-06-01
Packaged: 2018-07-25 11:18:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7530679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ANonsense/pseuds/ANonsense
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Have you ever wondered what a typical morning might look like in the house of eight, highly temperamental demon brothers? Satan has his own bathroom, but... well. That's still eight youths sharing one bathroom every day...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting for the Bathroom

Samael, of Time and Space,

Can take an hour to wash his face

And so, when he is feeling nice,

He’ll use the same half-hour twice.

He doesn’t feel that nice a lot

And, normally, his bathroom slot

Will last from ten past six to eight

And make his little brothers late.

 

Lucifer, the King of Light,

Thinks second place is his in right

And so, from eight to nine o’clock,

He locks the very faulty lock

And gets a daily one hour lease

To have his morning wash in peace.

 

Azazel, King of Spirits, third,

Will hurry in without a word,

Take barely any time at all,

Then rush back out into the hall

As if his tail has caught on fire

(He works a day job in Assiah).

 

Egyn next: the King of Water,

Red from early-morning slaughter,

Nine fifteen to half past ten

Will lock the bathroom door (again)

And use up in his given hour

The last hot water in the shower.

 

Iblis next; the Fire King,

Who sets his bedside clock to ring

At half past ten exactly so

That when the bathroom’s his he’ll know.

He leaves exactly twenty past;

The change before and after vast.

 

King of Insects, Beelzebub,

Takes long enough within the tub

But when you add ‘collecting’ too,

(For Beelzy owns an insect zoo)

It’s a wonder he comes out

(At twelve o’clock or thereabout).

 

Astaroth, the King of Rot,

Tries not to waste the time he’s got

So he is fastest at the sink

(He only stops to have a drink

And comb his hair and then he’s gone)

He sometimes leaves the tap turned on.

 

And last, Amaimon, King of Earth,

Who gives the room the widest berth

And spends as long as he can wait

In PJs and a rumpled state

And, when his older bros protest,

He’ll skip the wash and go get dressed.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N. For those who only know American English, ‘tap’ is ‘faucet’. And, apparently, (I only found out through Fanfiction anyway) Mephisto Pheles’ demon name is Samael.  
> All the demons listed above are correct according to the manga: I looked in the back section with the ‘Hobgoblin, kin of Amaimon, King of Earth’ things.


End file.
